Happiness by Joan D. Chittister

Author:Joan D. Chittister
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Publisher: Eerdmans Publishing
Published: 2013-06-10T16:00:00+00:00

chapter 22

Autonomy

If psychological testing has uncovered the major elements of happiness correctly, one thing is certain. Relatedness — an identification with people and groups that extend our horizons and support us as we move toward them — is a major factor in a person’s happiness level. But so is autonomy. So is the consciousness that we ourselves are in charge of our own happiness and that only we can do anything about it.

At first glance, the two poles of relatedness and autonomy may seem to be opposites. They look contradictory. They may even seem contradictory sometimes when the people in my life are counseling me to do one thing and I myself am intent on doing another. That analysis, however, fails to take into account that even real relatedness requires the autonomous choice of one person for another.

If I’m not relating to someone, it’s because I didn’t choose to relate to them, for whatever reasons known only to me: because I don’t love them, because they make me feel dependent on them, because I feel exploited by them, because even with them I feel lonely, because I’m too naive to recognize their love for me.

Sometimes I refuse to admit that, even to myself. Which is when the two dimensions of happiness get confused.

Autonomy is the awareness of myself as an independent adult. I am a self-initiating moral agent. What I do has consequences. That alone is enough to make everything I do or refuse to do both real and significant. Autonomy is what makes it possible to do anything moral at all. Without it, I am at best a pawn in someone else’s life. Without it, real happiness — the sense of having come to the wholeness of myself, of having made choices that make happiness possible — is impossible.

Lloyd George may have said it all when he wrote: “liberty has restraints but no frontiers.” Or, to put it another way, freedom has natural limits, true, but brings with it unlimited opportunities, as well. No, we are not free to do everything we would like to do. Being “free” to choose a profession in life does not mean that I can go into any profession I choose. My skills may not be good enough to get me this particular position. I may not have enough money to support myself while I train for a position like this one. I may not have the computer experience the company is looking for in this position. This particular company may not be hiring for the position I want. But, whatever the present restraints, I am still free to pursue a position if I make choices that resolve all those issues. If not here, then in limitless numbers of other places.

If we are autonomous, we are, at the same time, free to take responsibility for ourselves, free to become all that we can be.

To the person who is truly autonomous, the capacity to take responsibility for one’s own decisions becomes the measure of adulthood.

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